Monday, March 4, 2013

MAYBE WE SHOULD GIVE TEENAGERS A BREAK!

Social Networking can often bring a number of personal views to the surface. I have found it is easy for us to flex our opinionated muscles behind the keyboard of our computer devices. Lately, I have noticed many comments on social networking sites, predominately Facebook, taking stabs at teenagers today. Some have made bold statements suggesting “when I was a teenager, I would have never gotten away with this or that”. It reminded me of a time when I was teaching a parent education class for one of my employers. Prior to class starting, I heard many of my parents complaining about teenagers. One said, “Teenagers expect to get everything handed to them on a silver platter.” Another said, “Teenagers are so entitled. It was never that way for me.” I let them talk for about five minutes and patiently waited. When they finished talking I spoke of a time when I picked my daughter up from her middle school. There were two lanes for pick up, both with traffic going in the same direction. The right lane was the line designated for picking up our children. The left lane was for us to drive in after our children had safely entered our car so we could leave. During the many times I picked our children up from school, a hurried parent would always be driving in the left lane to cut in front of the other parents to pick up their children. Why? It seems obvious they were in more of a hurry than anyone else. Am I right? Or, is it possible they felt they were entitled? After sharing this story, the room was quiet. I do not believe it was an awkward silence. I had a good relationship with this group. It seemed more of a thought processing silence. Then I asked them the question, “If teenagers are really entitled, where do you believe they learned it from?” They all nodded their heads and said, “Us!” Please understand when I have a teenager in my office who presents an attitude of entitlement, I do not allow them to blame their parents. Blaming does not help anyone or anything. I help them process through their thoughts, emotions, patterns and behaviors before helping them to take responsibility for their own choices and actions. However, they are a product of us. Truthfully, some of my favorite people are teenagers. They are often the most authentic and compassionate people I know. Go to any church and make an announcement that you need some work done or provide the opportunity to serve someone in need. Who would likely be the first to respond? My guess would be teenagers. So, if we really believe teenagers are entitled, how about we find one or two to mentor and help along? What about going to the local school and suggesting we participate in a tutoring program? I believe this would help more than flexing our “social networking muscles” via posting critical statements of a generation that needs guidance and love, like all of us do.